18 situations where it’s okay to drink wine

We all live with them. The ‘rules’ we give ourselves for when we can and can’t pop open a bottle and listen contentedly to the glug, glug, glug as it goes lovingly into the glass.

Do we wait for 5pm? Yes, but only from Monday to Friday, on the weekend it’s whatever goes. What about at lunchtime? Sure, but only when there’s 3 or more of us, or when it’s someone’s birthday. Mimosas for breakfast are okay, but only when we’re on holidays. Or it’s Sunday. Or…

See? Rules. They may be flexible, or totally breakable, but they’re there toying with our conscience whenever the desire for wine strikes.

Here are 18 situations in which it’s perfectly fine to throw all your ‘rules’ out the window and just open the damn wine. You’re welcome.

  1. After a school P&C meeting

    If white is your thing, have it chilling before you even leave the house.

  2. Before you open your credit card statement

    Three zeros look like two after Chardonnay has done it’s work.

  3. Car broke down and you’re late for work, and you missed your deadline

    Why make a bad situation worse by turning up at all? Just sit down and open the wine.

  4. Your pet goldfish / budgie  / ferret died.

    So anytime that week really…

  5. Before your in-laws visit

  6. During your in-laws visit

  7. After your in-laws have left

  8. At a Junior Netball Final

    Forget the coffee cart, they should just have a wine bar set up…

  9. It’s a bit hot outside

  10. It’s a bit cold outside

  11. There’s two months to go until your Fiji trip

    But right NOW is when you need that holiday. Open the wine.

  12. Skinny jeans feel tight

    Start the diet tomorrow. Enjoy the wine now.

  13. Skinny jeans feel loose

    It’s time to reward yourself!

  14. All children are down for a nap at the same time

    This in itself is a miracle worthy of wine.

  15. They had one pair left and they were your size and they were 50% off

    Put your feet up so you can look at those babies and pour another glass!

  16. You get a flight upgrade

    Sure, it’s a 6am departure, but it’s 5pm somewhere.

  17. New neighbours pop in

    And you want to be friendly, right? And coffee is NOT the new wine. K?

  18. It’s Tuesday. 

    And you are still closer to Sunday than you are to Friday night. Wine.